Why Having a Beautiful Home Isn’t Selfish

Have you ever felt guilty for wanting more? Whether it's the latest and greatest technology, a quarterly getaway to a relaxing beach, or a bathroom resembling a luxury spa, it's easy to get caught up in feelings of shame for expressing our desires. After all, we've been ingrained with messages of practicing contentment since childhood.

Yes, wanting a beautiful home can certainly feel like a First World problem. I used to walk through my perfectly acceptable living room, dream of furnishing it beautifully, and then seconds later, chastise myself for being self-absorbed and greedy. But when I finally gave myself permission to decorate my home how I wanted to, I felt freer than I ever had before.

Rather than feeling like I had given into self-indulgence, an enormous weight lifted. The sadness and detachment I previously encountered in my home were gone, and I was instantly flooded with relief and joy. Whatever you’re looking to experience in your home, I’d love for you to find it.

Loving Your Home is Self-Care

Believe it or not, creating a personal space where you live the best moments of your life is actually one of the greatest forms of daily self-care. But how do you remove those innate feelings of guilt and selfishness? Simply remember that denying yourself happiness isn’t going to make you a better person. And you being happy doesn’t deprive anyone else of their happiness, either. 

When you accept that you can be a good person and have things that make you feel good, how you live your life and care for yourself changes dramatically. For example, experiencing my living room daily was beginning to lead to personal depression, as it was a daily reminder of my mother’s style and my awkward high school days. Was it acceptable to keep feeling this way? For me, the answer was no. 

If you’re in a similar situation, providing yourself what your soul craves will satisfy a personal need, not a want — and it will impact every aspect of your life for the better. (More on designing your home for your whole self here.)

Your Mood & Behaviors are Tied to Your Surroundings

Think about how you feel when you’re in a beautiful place. Whether you’re imagining a botanical garden, a beach at sunset, or a peaceful forest bursting with vibrant color, we likely all experience the same feelings: joy, inspiration, healing, gratitude, and the desire to share it with loved ones. 

Wouldn’t you agree that these are the very opposite emotions of selfishness? In fact, there is plenty of research about positive and negative behaviors correlating with physical surroundings. It’s natural. 

This is why I talk to my clients extensively about their memories of favorite places, what they looked like, and what was most meaningful. My goal is to use beautiful, personal design to create a home that gives you these same joy-inducing feelings every day. And there is absolutely nothing selfish about feeling your best. (Here are 5 ways your home can help you live in the moment.)

Details Matter

Each selection impacts the design of a space, ultimately determining how that space feels.

A Beautiful Home Uplifts and Heals

It’s no secret that a beautiful, personalized home can be healing. No matter what ails you, from physical wellness to emotional health, surroundings that refresh, uplift, ground, resonate, comfort, or enhance your personal wellbeing each day are incredibly beneficial to your needs in our complex world. 

Living in a home that speaks to your soul is a far cry from simply indulging a want, but rather a way to support you in reaching your fullest potential. A holistic home considers every aspect of your daily life, from practical to emotional needs, the way your family lives, and how you want to feel every day. These add up to a living experience that feels authentic, soul-soothing, and empowering.

Put Your Own Air Mask on First

When I think of how common it is to feel selfish for wanting a beautiful home, I’m reminded of a phrase we’re all familiar with: “Put your own air mask on before helping others.” Of course, it makes sense that we must meet our physical needs before we can meet the needs of others. But when we understand that this concept also applies to how our home environments affect our overall health, we can finally release the guilt.

Our surroundings provide us energy which is felt differently by different people. While one person may be drawn to white kitchen cabinets, another may crave wood tones. It’s not selfish to recognize the kind of energy you need to surround yourself with and embrace it for its healing properties. Incorporating these qualities into your home will equip you to uplift and serve others with a full heart.

If you’re ready to embrace your desires selflessly and create the beautiful home of your dreams, I’d love to be part of your journey. Please reach out to me, and together, we’ll design spaces that inspire your best self. 

Until then, enjoy our top shop picks of the month!

5 Top Shop Picks of the Month

1. I Totally Got This Journal: Full of motivational quotes, this mini journal is ready to cheer you on as you jot down your new year goals, ideas, and musings.

2. Small Wooden Bowl: This antiqued bowl can serve many purposes. Use it as a beautiful way to display your favorite decor items or a convenient drop-off place for car keys in your foyer.

3. Messy Bun Beanie: Keep your hair up and your ears toasty warm this winter with this adorable hand-crochet beanie. 

4. Sweet Streams Mask: Trouble falling asleep? This multi-functional mask is your solution. With built-in wireless headphones, you can stream your favorite music, podcast, or audiobook as you drift off to sleep. 

5. Pinch Me Therapy Dough: Infused with the calming scent of fresh lemongrass, this dough will quickly help you de-stress after a difficult day.

Yours,

Monique